How a proper BBQ is done.

[bob]

> After long months of cold & winter, we are finally coming up to summer
> and BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the
> etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking as it's the only type of
> cooking a real man will do, probably because there is an element of
> danger involved.
>
> When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are
> put into motion:
>
> Routine
> 1) The woman buys the food.
> 2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, & makes dessert.
> 3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along
> with the necessary cooking utensils & sauces, & takes it to the man who
> is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.
>
> Here comes the important part:
> 4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
>
> More routine
> 5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates & cutlery.
> 6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning.
> He thanks her & asks if she will bring another beer while he deals with
> the situation.
>
> Important again:
> 7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL & HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.
>
> More routine
> 8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins,
> sauces & brings them to the table.
> 9) After eating, the woman clears the table & does the dishes.
>
> And most important of all:
> 10) Everyone PRAISES the MAN & THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
> 11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off." And, upon
> seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing
> some women....

[Somerset Scooby]

Sounds about right to me :hysterical:

[scoobybeth]

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!Very true,only happened a few days ago!

[Scoobylove]

:hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical:

[S.P]

This Is So True..........only 1 Part Wrong













Ed Doesnt Even Cook!

[Scoobylove]

lots of parts wrong for my house....graham does it all.....:hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical:


while i drink:hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical:

[bob]

lots of parts wrong for my house....graham does it all.....:hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical:


while i drink:hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical:

Tis the best way why have a dog and bark yourself.....:hysterical: :hysterical: :hysterical:

[scoobybeth]

How a proper BBQ is really done. <?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>
After long months of cold & winter, we are finally coming up to summer and BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking as it's the only type of cooking a real man will do, probably because there is an element of danger involved.

When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:<o:p></o:p>


1) The woman buys the food from kwik save, she’s a classy chick. – Whilst the man is preparing the garden by cutting the grass and trimming the hedges, after this the man picks up the remaining garden rubbish and then goes through the grass with a rake. Providing the perfect lawn to impress their guests.

<o:p></o:p>
2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, & makes dessert. - Whilst the man exhausted from preparing the garden, brings out the garden furniture, cleans off all the cob webs and places the garden furniture in the ideal setting available in the garden (not to shady and not to light) always in consideration of needs of their guests.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>
3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking (by taking it out of the freezer), places it in a bowl along with a mish-mash of various cooking utensils & sauces, she marches it to the man and barks “ere ‘ave this” and throws it at the man, who has stood over the grill trying to get the thing to light properly. Once the man has lit the grill he supervises the flames, acting as a human shield so the little ones don’t get burnt. He grabs himself a nice cold beer to quench the thirst he has gained from all the hard work.

4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL. - Again shielding his guests by placing himself in front of the grill where the hot flames and now hot fat from the meat is spitting at him, burning and blistering his skin, this is all in a days work for the man.

5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates & cutlery. - A friend meets her inside where they bitch about the summer dress that <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" /><st1:City><st1:place>Sharon</st1:place></st1:City> is wearing. Whilst the man remains ever vigilant over the dangerous pyre, as well as providing polite and friendly conversation to his guests, and dispersing the drinks.<o:p></o:p>

6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. (HA HA HA, Silly woman, he is just ensuring that his guests don’t get E. Coli, the men look at each other with a knowing smile… they understand what he is doing), Ensuring he doesn’t cause a scene by hurting her feelings he thanks her & asks if she will bring another beer while he deals with his wife’s potentially embarrassing faux pas.

7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL & HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN. – She sneezes on to a burger, “that one will be hers”, he thinks to himself

8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces & brings them to the table. – Why is she doing this now and not during step 5? Time management is obviously not one of her better skills.<o:p></o:p>

9) After eating, the woman clears the table & does the dishes. – “Honey, leave them for tonight you sit down and enjoy some light conversation with our guests, I’ll do the dishes tomorrow whilst I’m making breakfast in bed for you”, his statement falls on deaf ears.

10) Everyone PRAISES the MAN & THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts. – Hip Hip hooray! “He protected our children from the hot grill, and saved us from the dreaded E. coli bug”. “Not only that but is the most gracious of hosts, he has provided us with polite conversation and more then adequate seating, this will be a barbeque that will long be remembered” another replies. The man embarrassed by the praise plays down his role in the evenings events, although his guests appreciate his efforts.<o:p></o:p>

11) When the guests leave The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off." And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women.... – So true!<o:p></o:p>

[Edmondo]

How a proper BBQ is really done. <?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>
After long months of cold & winter, we are finally coming up to summer and BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking as it's the only type of cooking a real man will do, probably because there is an element of danger involved.

When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:<o:p></o:p>


1) The woman buys the food from kwik save, she’s a classy chick. – Whilst the man is preparing the garden by cutting the grass and trimming the hedges, after this the man picks up the remaining garden rubbish and then goes through the grass with a rake. Providing the perfect lawn to impress their guests.

<o:p></o:p>
2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, & makes dessert. - Whilst the man exhausted from preparing the garden, brings out the garden furniture, cleans off all the cob webs and places the garden furniture in the ideal setting available in the garden (not to shady and not to light) always in consideration of needs of their guests.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>
3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking (by taking it out of the freezer), places it in a bowl along with a mish-mash of various cooking utensils & sauces, she marches it to the man and barks “ere ‘ave this” and throws it at the man, who has stood over the grill trying to get the thing to light properly. Once the man has lit the grill he supervises the flames, acting as a human shield so the little ones don’t get burnt. He grabs himself a nice cold beer to quench the thirst he has gained from all the hard work.

4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL. - Again shielding his guests by placing himself in front of the grill where the hot flames and now hot fat from the meat is spitting at him, burning and blistering his skin, this is all in a days work for the man.

5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates & cutlery. - A friend meets her inside where they bitch about the summer dress that <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" /><st1:City><st1:place>Sharon</st1:place></st1:City> is wearing. Whilst the man remains ever vigilant over the dangerous pyre, as well as providing polite and friendly conversation to his guests, and dispersing the drinks.<o:p></o:p>

6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. (HA HA HA, Silly woman, he is just ensuring that his guests don’t get E. Coli, the men look at each other with a knowing smile… they understand what he is doing), Ensuring he doesn’t cause a scene by hurting her feelings he thanks her & asks if she will bring another beer while he deals with his wife’s potentially embarrassing faux pas.

7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL & HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN. – She sneezes on to a burger, “that one will be hers”, he thinks to himself

8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces & brings them to the table. – Why is she doing this now and not during step 5? Time management is obviously not one of her better skills.<o:p></o:p>

9) After eating, the woman clears the table & does the dishes. – “Honey, leave them for tonight you sit down and enjoy some light conversation with our guests, I’ll do the dishes tomorrow whilst I’m making breakfast in bed for you”, his statement falls on deaf ears.

10) Everyone PRAISES the MAN & THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts. – Hip Hip hooray! “He protected our children from the hot grill, and saved us from the dreaded E. coli bug”. “Not only that but is the most gracious of hosts, he has provided us with polite conversation and more then adequate seating, this will be a barbeque that will long be remembered” another replies. The man embarrassed by the praise plays down his role in the evenings events, although his guests appreciate his efforts.<o:p></o:p>

11) When the guests leave The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off." And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women.... – So true!<o:p></o:p>


cracking:sign0191: :sign0191: :sign0191: